To Start a Family or Not? What Would You Do?
I have a question for the parents out there. I'm 28 and my husband is 30, and we got married in 2015 after 10 years together. Hubby is currently being treated for bowel cancer which has spread to his liver and a few lymph nodes, although he's had liver surgery and his recent scan showed a slight shrinkage in the lymphs. The oncologist is still going for a curative treatment.
We've always wanted to start a family together and a lot of our friends are getting married and having children which is quite difficult for us to see, even though we are of course really happy for them.
My best friend told me today that she is pregnant which has brought it home even more for us. I'm over the moon for her, but it makes me sad. I always thought we would have children around the same time and, I know it's silly and I shouldn't be thinking this way, I am secretly petrified we're going to be left behind whilst everyone around us reaches these wonderful milestones in life.
My husband and I have had quite an open and honest discussion about having children, the reality is if we were to go ahead with it, I have to bare in mind I could be bringing up a child as a single mother. On the flipside, we could be 'umming' and 'ahh-ing' about the idea for ages and we may find ourselves in the same situation years down the line regretting that we didn't have a child 10 years earlier. It's a hugely difficult decision.
My question is what would you do in this situation? And for those who are parents, how did you feel when you brought that child into the world? Did you feel you could bring them up by yourself, would you bring them up as a single parent? Obviously I understand this is a decision only Matt and I can make, but I would be interested to hear your views. Any advice would be really appreciated.